The number of times I have created something and then didn’t put it out there because I didn’t believe it was good enough is absolutely absurd.
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The need to be perfect, to have things done to such a high standard, often means I stop before I even start.

I know that there are certain methods of creating that bring me joy, but sometimes, when I sit down to do them, the ugly ego voice in my head won’t let me work without a constant onslaught of words, “This will never be good enough, you have no skill, you’ve doing it wrong, it doesn’t look right, nobody will like this, what are you even doing, you should just stop.”

The path here is to stop the spiral. Shut out the evil voice. Choose not to believe its lies. To do it anyway. To allow myself to learn, to grow, to be messy in my pursuit. To enjoy the process rather than judge the final result. To create for me and not for the validation of the ego or some other voice.

It is especially hard for me when I am overwhelmed, sad, ruminating, feeling a little lost, and pointless not to believe my inner critic. The voice is loud and strong and has been an underlying current my entire life.

Things that help shut it off are deep breaths, running, really any movement, dancing, getting into mindless creative flow - sketching, coloring, flow toys, listening to optimistic podcasts.

I am really loving Cathy Heller’s Abundant Ever After podcast this week. She has made me cry at least three times. The synchronicity of her father dying on July 3rd this last year and my father dying exactly a decade before that on the same day is not lost on me.

This one was a great episode with Martha Beck on How to Use Creativity to Overcome Anxiety

While I’m not outwardly a religious person, I am spiritual, and I do find that her podcast helps me find that connection to a greater source, purpose, universe. The concept of leaning into energy and how, in order to get out of the cycle of overwhelm and dissociation, we need to lean into abundance as if we already have it is something I can grab hold of.

And in those moments where I look at my life, I can see how much abundance of life, love, and joy is truly present - I can turn off the voice that says that I am not good enough, that no work I do will ever be good enough.
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I don’t want to get to the end of my life, having never gone after my dreams, because some little voice in my own damn head stopped me.

It seems that my biggest battles are always with myself.

I wonder, are you the same? How do you shut off the little critic inside your head? What have they been stopping you from doing? How can you choose not to believe the lies and instead take intentional actions toward your dreams?

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Morgan